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The water from the showerhead is scalding. It burns along my skin, turning it a lovely shade of pink. I can’t bother to care, since I want all this blood off of me. Its not my blood mind you. No it’s his. I stare as the pink tinged water rolls down the drain. I’m sitting on my ass with my knees pulled up to my chest.

My mind is completely numb.

I refuse to think about the things I have done. I refuse to think about what I have been through. Life throws you shit just to mess you up. Well life can take a damn hike. I have had enough crap happen to me in my seventeen years that I refuse to let anything else bad happen to me.

“You need to get that blood washed off. ” My older brother Aiden’s voice grumbles through the shower curtain. “I have some clothes set out for you. We still have to dye your hair. ” I see his shadow lift its hands up to pinch between its eyes.

“Okay. ” I whisper. Standing up I grab the body wash off the rack that is hanging off the showerhead.

If only he had wanted me. But no he wanted a boy. Not that it makes it any different, but then I could have saved Aiden from the horrible things he did. If only.

I step out and dry off. I wrap the towel around my body when I’m done and sit in the chair that sits in front of my mother’s vanity. “I’m done. ” I call out to my brother.

“About time. We have to get out of here like five minutes ago. ” He picks up the latex gloves lying on the vanity and proceeds to slather my hair with bleach.   It burns my scalp and I wince. My hair is a natural honey brown, but I’m going into hiding. I have to become someone different. I have to leave behind everything I love. Everyone I love, well, except for Aiden.